The One With Day 13
Current Mood: Tired
Well, today was okay. Gosh, I am SO tired! I may not make it all the way through this post. Choir was a blast! And through it God taught me quite a few things.
1. This philosophy that Respect and Friendship are mutually exclusive was coined by those too lazy to strive to understand those in their care. I am very tired of hearing sponsors tell other sponsors, "Now, you know that you cannot be their buddy. If they like you, they won't respect you." This sounds to me like a poor excuse not to form relationships with the kids in the choir. The truth of the matter is, they will respect you far more if you have a good relationship with you. Then you can change their behavior without building resentment. It irritates me that some of my fellow leaders think their job is related to that of a prison guard. That's not how this work. Sponsors are not there simply to reprimand students who are cutting up, they are there to teach and guide as well. In fact, I would say that it is MORE important to be someone they trust and look up to than to be a staunch disciplinarian. I am not saying that we shouldn't help preserve order, but our focus should be on making them better people and stronger Christians, even at the cost of a top-notch choir.
Let me honest with you. Some might say that I am bright-eyed newbie in the choir company, and that may be true. But some days I find myself disillusioned by other sponsors. Some stand in the back and talk amongst themselves for the duration of the rehearsal. Others sit in the midst of the students and scowl at those who talk. Haven't they missed the point? Why don't they realize their purpose? If they are not there to build healthy mentoring relationships with kids who need it, why come at all? Discipline, many will say - a fallacy. Grady can take care of himself. There is not a doubt in the mind of a single student or sponsor that Grady could handle all 150 choir members without any help. He can be THAT scary ;-). I KNOW why I am there. And even if it irritates other sponsors that I consider the students more than naughty dogs deserving of a water bottle spritz, I will continue to do so. Authority figures CAN be a friend and be respected at the same time. I refuse to blindly accept the admonishings of those who do not understand the privilege of the position they in habit.
2. God has plans for me, even when I am too chicken to take a leap of faith. There are three kids in the choir that I do not like. There, I said it. Wrote it. Whatever. Wait, wait, wait...I don't treat them any differently (except for maybe efforting slightly to avoid them), but they are not in my list of favorites. I should say WERE three kids... I knew deep down that I should not feel the way I did and that it was probably because I just hadn't really given them a chance. Well, THAT'S not quite true, they had earned my distaste. Anyway, story still applies...So, I worked on altering my attitutde, but I never could go up and start a conversation. God finally said, "Fine, coward. I'll do it." Two weeks ago found me sitting next to one of them. By the end of the rehearsal I had deduced that yes, he is a bit of a choir slacker and yes, he has no intention of singing or taking any of this seriously...but he's nice. Out of his element, but still capable of common human niceties. Today, problem kid #2 suddenly started talking to me...unprompted! From the second he turned around and joined his friends in giving me goofy looks in the middle of rehearsal, I felt God tapping on the inside of my skull. He was saying, "You trust me to keep the entire world in check, but buck at the thought of talking to one kid who intimidates you. Shame! You want to understand these kids and I am going to help you do it."
What. God knows morse code.
Anyway, I guess today was just a learning day in choir. One of the other 30 day bloggers from the school said that he felt like God was opening up his eyes so that he could see things the way God sees them. I think that is accurate. It's interesting.
Uggggg....Goodnight!!
Well, today was okay. Gosh, I am SO tired! I may not make it all the way through this post. Choir was a blast! And through it God taught me quite a few things.
1. This philosophy that Respect and Friendship are mutually exclusive was coined by those too lazy to strive to understand those in their care. I am very tired of hearing sponsors tell other sponsors, "Now, you know that you cannot be their buddy. If they like you, they won't respect you." This sounds to me like a poor excuse not to form relationships with the kids in the choir. The truth of the matter is, they will respect you far more if you have a good relationship with you. Then you can change their behavior without building resentment. It irritates me that some of my fellow leaders think their job is related to that of a prison guard. That's not how this work. Sponsors are not there simply to reprimand students who are cutting up, they are there to teach and guide as well. In fact, I would say that it is MORE important to be someone they trust and look up to than to be a staunch disciplinarian. I am not saying that we shouldn't help preserve order, but our focus should be on making them better people and stronger Christians, even at the cost of a top-notch choir.
Let me honest with you. Some might say that I am bright-eyed newbie in the choir company, and that may be true. But some days I find myself disillusioned by other sponsors. Some stand in the back and talk amongst themselves for the duration of the rehearsal. Others sit in the midst of the students and scowl at those who talk. Haven't they missed the point? Why don't they realize their purpose? If they are not there to build healthy mentoring relationships with kids who need it, why come at all? Discipline, many will say - a fallacy. Grady can take care of himself. There is not a doubt in the mind of a single student or sponsor that Grady could handle all 150 choir members without any help. He can be THAT scary ;-). I KNOW why I am there. And even if it irritates other sponsors that I consider the students more than naughty dogs deserving of a water bottle spritz, I will continue to do so. Authority figures CAN be a friend and be respected at the same time. I refuse to blindly accept the admonishings of those who do not understand the privilege of the position they in habit.
2. God has plans for me, even when I am too chicken to take a leap of faith. There are three kids in the choir that I do not like. There, I said it. Wrote it. Whatever. Wait, wait, wait...I don't treat them any differently (except for maybe efforting slightly to avoid them), but they are not in my list of favorites. I should say WERE three kids... I knew deep down that I should not feel the way I did and that it was probably because I just hadn't really given them a chance. Well, THAT'S not quite true, they had earned my distaste. Anyway, story still applies...So, I worked on altering my attitutde, but I never could go up and start a conversation. God finally said, "Fine, coward. I'll do it." Two weeks ago found me sitting next to one of them. By the end of the rehearsal I had deduced that yes, he is a bit of a choir slacker and yes, he has no intention of singing or taking any of this seriously...but he's nice. Out of his element, but still capable of common human niceties. Today, problem kid #2 suddenly started talking to me...unprompted! From the second he turned around and joined his friends in giving me goofy looks in the middle of rehearsal, I felt God tapping on the inside of my skull. He was saying, "You trust me to keep the entire world in check, but buck at the thought of talking to one kid who intimidates you. Shame! You want to understand these kids and I am going to help you do it."
What. God knows morse code.
Anyway, I guess today was just a learning day in choir. One of the other 30 day bloggers from the school said that he felt like God was opening up his eyes so that he could see things the way God sees them. I think that is accurate. It's interesting.
Uggggg....Goodnight!!
posted by Jason Hunt at
11:41 PM
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